Shame on me.
Mea culpa.
Where is my whip?
But then, I did have a laparoscopic myomectomy two weeks ago with Dr. Stephen "Steady Hands" Brisbois in Spokane (read about it here).
And for the most part, my recovery has been frickin' awesome.
Except for one...itty...bitty...thing...
Food.
One would think that hospitals would be the place to be for healthy, wholesome food, what with their need to sustain scores of sick and injured people who really don't need anymore problems.
But no. After my operation, my first "meal" was chicken broth, saltine crackers, Lipton hot tea and Ocean Spray Cranberry Juice. I took one, tentative sip of the chicken broth and had to push it away: it practically screamed MSG. I also passed on the tea (is it wise for me to drink caffeine while at the same time taking Oxycodin?). And the "juice" would have been better labeled as "Cranberry-Colored Sugar Water." The saltines became my new best friend. I devoured them with the grace of Cartman at a food buffet. In fact, crackers were pretty much all I ate for about 12 hours.
For breakfast, I was served utterly tasteless Cream of Wheat and canned peaches in syrup, along with some orange juice laden with Miralax
. The Breakfast of Champions.That would, perhaps, explain why after I was discharged from the hospital, I decided that what I really needed for dinner was a burger. Granted, I'd lost like 1/2 a pint of blood in surgery the day before. So I was feeling a little blood-thirsty.
But suffice to say...I chose poorly. And the road-trip home didn't help matters any.
Would it kill freeway food establishments to serve some fresh fruits and veggies? Is there any establishment along the I-90 corridor for whom the oven or the steamer basket hold a higher place of honor than say...the deep fryer? Granted, I spent most of the ride strung out on Oxycodin and therefore might have overlooked the roadside Garden of Eden. But, I have my doubts since I completed the Spokane-Tacoma road trip this week as well (for my first post-op appointment) and I didn't see anything.
At any rate, since getting home, I've been better. But the small issue of unemployment has undermined some of my hippie diet efforts. Thankfully, we have a Winco nearby with really affordable raw almonds and pitted dates in bulk. These items, along with agave nectar, vanilla, and sea salt allow me to make my own oh-so-delicious almond milk. It has the consistency of cow's milk, with a subtly sweet flavor and is a variation on the "Velvety Dessert Milk" in Alive in 5
, one of the cookbooks to the right.At any rate, I'm feeling MUCH better, now that the fibroid is gone: many, many, many thanks to my surgeon; but NO thanks to the hospital "chef."
